Dear Annie, How do you know if you should reply to a text? I went out with a man who I met at a Meetup function. A couple of days later, he texted me and asked for a date on Saturday evening. I'm not crazy about being asked for a date via text messaging, but I told him that I would have loved to go.
Today I got a text that said, "Hi Nikki." I didn't answer because we had already planned our date, so I didn't think it required a response. Was that the correct thing to do?
This made me wonder whether he's confident with women. After all, I accepted the date, so that should be good enough. Nikki
Many men believe that it's OK to set up a date via text. If you prefer that he calls, wait until the next time he texts you. Answer briefly and say how you prefer to communicate. "I'd love it if we could talk on the phone." He'll call if he's interested in making you happy.
When you don't respond to a man who is reaching out, it undermines his confidence. He's likely to interpret your silence as, "I'm not interested in you." He'll probably distance himself. He may even think that you might not want to see him.
Think of it this way: What if you were out and bumped into an acquaintance who didn't reply when you said "Hi?" If you're like most people, you're likely to feel snubbed. You'd probably be reluctant to pursue a friendship with someone who doesn't acknowledge you. Men aren't so different in this regard. Most feel hurt when they are ignored.
If you go by the rule of, "responding to a man's communications (texts, calls, emails) in a timely (but not urgent) manner and keep it friendly, fun and upbeat," chances are that he'll appreciate your friendliness and feel more comfortable moving closer.